Humana is Killing Writer’s Group Guru!

Help me save Peter. Call to action below.

With Covid, my only link to humanity is my online writer’s group on Google Meet/Drive. Dearest to me is a former English teacher named Peter Uttal. A former Miami teacher of the year, his guidance of our group is invaluable. One time he called me out on hiding behind “clever” quips. Peter’s right. Because was an alt rock radio DJ for so long, quick little soundbites come cheaply and easily to me. Through blunt honesty, Peter’s helped me find my truth.

Now, Peter is sick, without a bone marrow transplant, he’ll die.

His HMO is delaying treatment, which in Peter’s case is the same thing as killing him. Peter’s body no longer makes red blood cells, and over the computer screen you can see him paling.

Help me help Peter both by sharing this post and sending emails to two higher ups at Humana, his health insurers.

Humana CEO: bbroussard@humana.com

hannewinckel@humana.com.

Thank You so much,

Allison Strong, The Radioactive Patient

Back from the Black

So here’s the deal, About two years ago I had a scary scary month’s long depressive episode. I withdrew from social media, paid vlogging and public speaking to focus on my own health. I mean, you can’t share what you do not have, right?

I’m in my fourth consecutive year of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy at a local college (sliding scale because my therapists are technically students) and this winter, I got off of Suboxone right as the Coronavirus hit. And during this epidemic, I’ve discovered Youtube!

Because I’m so musically focused, my Youtube channel is “The Radio Active (two words here) Patient. Will be changing the name of this blog of mine as well. The Radio Active Patient. Because so much of my survival is attributable to bands like Nine Inch Nails, Nirvana, Rage vs the Machine, The Who, Led Zepplin…….they kept me company and kept me on the planet.

Video re extreme bipolar survival tips. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aE19khhTWI0&t=38s

On Surviving Suicidality Like a Rock Star (2 minute vid)

I had a Kate Spade July, Suicidality 30 days straight four times a minute, as illogical as they were vividly articulate. Bphope for Bp Magazine

BTW, “Prozac Poopout” is a true phenomen, giggled about behind closed clinical doors. It’s not discussed cuz it does nothing for brand loyalty. Heheheh.

bphope.comhttps://www.bphope.com/bipolar-stories-video-blog/bipolar-depression-how-i-came-up-from-the-deep/?fbclid=IwAR1o7OP3HN0a9s-rhb6kMb4ojINGF6JFtYrqXtsOWq7qZJu4VRqllQ2a8UA

On Surviving Suicidality Like a Rock Star (2 minute vid)

I had a Kate Spade July, Suicidality 30 days straight four times a minute, as illogical as they were vividly articulate. Bphope for Bp Magazine

BTW, “Prozac Poopout” is a true phenomen, giggled about behind closed clinical doors. It’s not discussed cuz it does nothing for brand loyalty. Heheheh.

bphope.comhttps://www.bphope.com/bipolar-stories-video-blog/bipolar-depression-how-i-came-up-from-the-deep/?fbclid=IwAR1o7OP3HN0a9s-rhb6kMb4ojINGF6JFtYrqXtsOWq7qZJu4VRqllQ2a8UA

On Surviving Suicidality Like a Rock Star (2 minute vid)

I had a Kate Spade July, Suicidality 30 days straight four times a minute, as illogical as they were vividly articulate. Bphope for Bp Magazine

BTW, “Prozac Poopout” is a true phenomen, giggled about behind closed clinical doors. It’s not discussed cuz it does nothing for brand loyalty. Heheheh.

bphope.comhttps://www.bphope.com/bipolar-stories-video-blog/bipolar-depression-how-i-came-up-from-the-deep/?fbclid=IwAR1o7OP3HN0a9s-rhb6kMb4ojINGF6JFtYrqXtsOWq7qZJu4VRqllQ2a8UA

A Former Drug Addict and Stronger for It

This is why I’m still alive….because I’m a former drug addict and stronger for it.

Some people might call the following a manipulation of the system, but I regard this as a tactfully maneuvered agreement.

Because of all my medical conditions (bipolar disorder, psoriasis, chronic pain, prediabetic, etc.) and side effects (Including chronic dry eye, high cholesterol, constipation, Tardive Dyskinesia), …I’m on a long list of medications, most of which I have to fight my insurance company for. I’m a worthy adversary, just in case you’re wondering…they probably hate me. I cost them money and eat up their time with grievances and expedited appeals…..

This reminds me of the Nirvana lament, (song) “Heart Shaped Box” that goes, “Hey,Wait, I’ve got a new Complaint” LOL.

Right this second, I’m on hold for forty minutes now, as I blog this, with my Medicare Part D prescription drug plan, Silverscript/Caremark/CVS.

I have what some people call “Tardive Dysphoria,” also called “Prozac Poopout,” (poor Eli Lilly and their Green and Off White Giant, it was so spectacularly successful, when the pendulum swung the other way, Prozac ended up with this moniker, in a classic case of branding in reverse)…

Anyway, I took Prozac for 8 great years and then….it stopped working for me. This has been the normal course of my illness since 1997. My antidepressants burn out and it’s severe, dramatic. Does this sound familiar? I’m functional, but barely breathing until I find a new antidepressant….basically, we rotate them, and sometimes, I have to take an entire month off of them to allow my brain to ‘reset.’

Antidepressant burnout is actually more common than not…they even have a rating scale for it. However, it’s not discussed…due to doctors and drug companies not wanting to set off the reverse placebo effect….plus, it does nothing for brand loyalty.

Anyway, I take the generic Pristiq for three weeks, and I start having notions of hanging myself…vivid and articulate like.

So I’m asking myself: What’s changed???  Luckily, I’m a Squirrel, and stash handfuls of RX drugs for just such an occasion. I pulled all the generic Pristiq out of my trays and replaced it with expired Pristiq 100 mg samples, some of which are cut up. (They tell you never to cut up meds, but I like to stretch them, especially right about now)  Within two days, I bounced right back. No more wondering whether a belt or a rope would be better to dangle from.

I hustled in to see my psychiatrist of 21 years, who did a ‘formulary exception request,’ which was immediately approved. The problem was, I couldn’t get any new Pristiq because I’d just gotten the generic junk two weeks ago.

My 45 minutes on hold with CVS was rewarded, I didn’t even have to ask for a supervisor. They did an override and I can pick some more up tomorrow. I wish I could tell you that was my only medical encounter this week…..far from it.

But still….today, tonight especially, I won.  I’m still alive, propelled by my expired Pristiq, and I’m grateful for my fortitude. The skills of a former drug addict came in handy tonight. You can take the dope out of the fiend, but not the fiend out of the dope.

Is my Generic Pristiq inferior to name brand? CVS came thru….thank Goodness!

Some people might call this manipulation of the system, but I regard this as a tactfully maneuvered agreement.

Because of all my medical conditions (bipolar disorder, psoriasis, chronic pain, prediabetic, etc.) and side effects (Including chronic dry eye, high cholesterol, constipation, Tardive Dyskinesia), …I’m on a long list of medications, most of which I have to fight my insurance company for. I’m a worthy adversary, just in case you’re wondering…they probably hate me. I cost them money and eat up their time with grievances and expedited appeals…..reminds me of the Nirvana Song “Heart Shaped Box” that goes, “Hey,Wait, I’ve got a new Complaint” LOL.

Right this second, I’m on hold for forty minutes now, as I blog this, with my Medicare Part D prescription drug plan, Silverscript/Caremark/CVS.

I have what some people call “Tardive Dysphoria,” also called “Prozac Poopout,” (poor Eli Lilly and their Green and Off White Giant, it was so spectacularly successful, when the pendulum swung the other way, Prozac ended up with this moniker, in a classic case of branding in reverse)…

Anyway, I took Prozac for 8 great years and then….it stopped working for me. This has been the normal course of my illness since 1997. My antidepressants burn out and it’s severe, dramatic. Does this sound familiar? I’m functional, but barely breathing until I find a new antidepressant….basically, we rotate them, and sometimes, I have to take an entire month off of them to allow my brain to ‘reset.’

Antidepressant burnout is actually more common than not…they even have a rating scale for it. However, it’s not discussed…due to doctors and drug companies not wanting to set off the reverse placebo effect….plus, it does nothing for brand loyalty.

Anyway, I take the generic Pristiq for three weeks, and I start having notions of hanging myself…vivid and articulate like.

So I’m asking myself: What’s changed???  Luckily, I’m a Squirrel, and stash handfuls of RX drugs for just such an occasion. I pulled all the generic Pristiq out of my trays and replaced it with expired Pristiq 100 mg samples, some of which are cut up. (They tell you never to cut up meds, but I like to stretch them, especially right about now)  Within two days, I bounced right back. No more wondering whether a belt or a rope would be better to dangle from.

I hustled in to see my psychiatrist of 21 years, who did a ‘formulary exception request,’ which was immediately approved. The problem was, I couldn’t get any new Pristiq because I’d just gotten the generic junk two weeks ago.

My 45 minutes on hold with CVS was rewarded, I didn’t even have to ask for a supervisor. They did an override and I can pick some more up tomorrow. I wish I could tell you that was my only medical encounter this week…..far from it.

But still….today, tonight especially, I won.  I’m still alive, propelled by my expired Pristiq, and I’m grateful for my fortitude. The skills of a former drug addict came in handy tonight. You can take the dope out of the fiend, but not the fiend out of the dope.